Inner Dialogue of a Teacher at a Back to School Sale

Well, today was the day, teachers.  The HUGE….(wait for it)….20% percent off Back to School sale at many different teacher stores! Wait, are you meaning to tell me that I may save 40 CENTS on these stickers?!  What’s NOT to love?!  It’s the one summer day when you actually don’t mind setting your alarm so that you can go snatch up a million goodies to deck out your classroom for the new school year.

My bestie teacher friend, Kambra, and I made a day out of it, complete with secured childcare, Starbucks, lunch at an actual restaurant, and working in our classrooms. I’d also like to add that I am only two weeks from the due date for our son, making this an extra special (and risky) getaway.
Together, we composed the following “Inner Dialogue of a Teacher at a Back to School Sale.”Enjoy! J
OMG it’s only 10AM.  Why are there so many cars here?  We’d better hurry because so help me, if that “Bebop Birdies” bulletin board set is gone, I’m gonna flip.
Aww, look at that cute, young teacher with her five shopping bags! She’s pretty much skipping. Gotta be her first year.
What’s that smell?  LAMINATION! Totally gonna be cranking out at least 50 feet of that later.  Bonus points for bringing a coupon for 10 free feet.  My three year old is old enough to help me cut it out now, right? 
Hmm…a small basket or shopping cart? I’m not getting all that much stuff, right? Totally sticking to the PTA budget.  I can manage with a small basket.  Wait, there’s only one big cart left.  It’s mine now!
Ooh! Giveaways!!! Let’s enter our name at least 8 times so we can win a Classroom Makeover!
A FREE “Retro Chic” Tote bag? YESSSSSS.
Here it is! My dream classroom décor collection! “Bebop Birdies” in the HOUSE! I need Every. Single. Piece.
Stick to the shopping list.  Stick to the shopping list.
What could I use this for?  It doesn’t matter. It matches and it’s 20% off.
Okay I see matching months, calendar days, weather, but no actual calendar grid. Where is it?! Well they have this plain white and gray one.  Ewww.  Unacceptable.
Should I get the plain burlap “Filetastic” organizer or chevron burlap? Wait, that’s not even an option. Chevron it is.
Ahh! SO irresistable!
And there’s also the “resistable…”
Okay, I should definitely buy a few things that will help children learn.  A cute classroom isn’t the MOST important thing. (Although it’s pretty darn important.) This book of reading games on clearance will do. Oh, and some number grids! There’s only 18 left so I’d better buy them all.  ALL MINE!
What’s that in that girl’s cart? (immediately sticking hands in cart) “Where’d you find that?” (pretty much running with cart to designated section)
Okay, ready to check out! OMG, is this the LINE?! I can’t even see the front doors anymore!  Maybe we could get pizza delivered while we wait. I sure hope my water doesn’t break at the Back to School sale at Mardel. That would be a bit awkward. 
Hey look! A matching t-shirt to match my classroom theme! Too much?? Maybe so…. Teachin’ on the FLY!
FINALLY! I’m all done! Just don’t even look at the receipt total. We can write some off for taxes anyway, right?